I hope everyone had a HAPPY THANKSGIVING! We did. We packed up the battlewagon (our 9 passenger travel van) and headed to visit with Kelly’s side of the family. I was concerned about the stress of the boys, but we handled it well and were able to keep their stress down. We made sure they were close to us and did not let others hold them. It was really nice to spend the day with family.

I made Snickers Salad to take with us and thought I’d share the recipe.

Snickers Salad

17 fun size snickers

1 can pineapple chunks

1 can mandarin oranges

Grapes

1 apple

8 oz cool whip

Cut apple and drain canned fruit. Mix fruit. Cut snickers into bit size pieces. Mix with salad. Mix in cool whip and serve.

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Here is another example of Rage/Anger being fear. We arrived at Grammy and Pa’s house near bedtime on Wednesday night so we let the boys stretch their legs and play for a bit. At about 9:30 we finally said it was time for bed. We did our normal routine of holding the boys and just loving on them for a while. When Kelly put Sasha in his pack-and-play he went into an all out RAGE! He was screaming deep in his throat, rocking furiously, scratching, hitting etc. His rage was powerful! I’m not sure I have ever seen him quite so mad. I stood there with my mouth open for a moment and then it triggered anger in me and my first though was that Sasha was just being defiant. Then it dawned on me how scared he was. He was in a new house, new bed, new smells and sounds. For all he knew we were leaving him and walking out the door never to return.

I picked him up and started talking softly to him and rubbing his back. I told him mama and papa were staying right here and we were not going to leave him. He snuggled into me and I just held him and started singing to him…I almost couldn’t sing because he was breaking my heart and bringing tears to my eyes. After a bit I laid him back down reassuring him the whole time I was not going to leave. He was tense, but lay down without crying or tantruming. Pretty soon all three boys were sleeping soundly.

Sasha did wake in the night and he went from making a little sound to all out terror when he didn’t know where he was. I started talking to him and reassuring him we were still here. As soon as he heard my voice he was quiet and went back to sleep. Poor little guy is just so scared all the time.

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As I carried Sasha from the car to our house last night we got onto the porch and he said, “Home?” We walked in and I said, “We are home!” and breathed deeply. Yep, it smelled like our house. I am so much more aware of smells that are comforting like our home. When you are in it every day you don’t give it a though. It is when you are gone for a while that you can smell it when you walk in. It would have been interesting if we could have tested them in the moment to see if their stress levels came down. Hmm… I would like to think we have created a low stress environment in our home that it did.